Francis de Sales: Overcoming Eagerness

Eagerness in devotion is one of the worst traitors

Last week, we explored Jane de Chantal's wisdom; this week, we delve into the guidance of her mentor, Francis de Sales¹. His letter to a young lady in 1611 touches on a theme that resonates with me: the misdirection of my spiritual eagerness. De Sales notes, "It pretends to kindle us, while, in fact, it chills our life," emphasizing the need to guard against haste, especially in prayer. His advice invites me to slow down, embrace patience, and look for grace in the quiet act of waiting. When de Sales refers to us as "worthless," it's crucial to understand he's not saying we lack value. Instead, he's highlighting our absolute dependence on God, pointing out that our true worth stems from being created in his image, which goes far beyond our own achievements or merits.

Dear Young Lady,

I received your letter some little time ago, and rejoice in it as a proof of your confidence in my affection, of which, indeed, you have no cause to doubt. I am only sorry that I am so little able to answer your questions concerning your prayers; but I know that you are in a place and in the company of those who can give all you want; still, I cannot altogether refuse to say what little I may.

The anxiety you speak of as disturbing your meditation, and the eagerness you indulge in seeking something on which to fix and satisfy your mind, is alone sufficient to hinder you in finding what you want. We pass over the thing we are seeking a hundred times when we seek it too eagerly. Nothing can come of such useless hurry and restlessness, save weariness of spirit; and thus the coldness and disinterest in your soul. I do not know what remedies you should employ; but I think that if you can conquer this eagerness you will have gained a great step, for it is one of the worst traitors we have to deal with in devotion and true holiness. It pretends to kindle us, while, in fact, it chills our life, and it makes us run merely that we may stumble. Eagerness and hurry must be perpetually guarded against, above all in prayer.

To help you in doing this, remember that the graces and gifts of prayer are not streams of earthly water, but come from Heaven; and all our unassisted efforts are incapable of winning them, although we ought to make ready in all humility and meekness to receive them. It is our part to keep our hearts open to Heaven’s Grace, ready for the outpouring of celestial dew. Never forget, when you begin to pray, that you are entering God’s Presence, for two main reasons: first, to pay Him the honour and homage due to Him; which may be rendered without the speaking of a word on either side. It lies mainly in a silent acknowledgment that He is our God, and we His worthless creatures; and in placing ourselves before Him in an attitude of humble waiting upon His Will. How many courtiers are there who appear continually before the King, without expecting to speak to him or to be spoken to by him, all their object being that he may see them, and that they may testify the devotion with which they seek to serve him. And, in like manner, it is a very good and holy and pure object with which to present ourselves before God, when we do so merely to set forth our gratitude and our will to render Him a devoted service.

The second reason which takes us into God’s Presence is, that we may talk with Him, and hear Him speaking within our hearts by His Gracious Inspirations. This is usually a most intense enjoyment; it is a great privilege to speak familiarly with our Dear Lord, and when He speaks to us He sheds an abundance of His precious balm and sweetness upon the soul.

Now, my dear child, there must be one or other of these graces in your prayer. If we are able to speak to our Lord, let us do so, — let us praise, pray, and hearken; if our speech is hindered, let us, nevertheless, remain bowed down before Him; He will behold us. He will accept our patient waiting, and look graciously upon our silence; it may be He will amaze us by leading us by the hand and bringing us into His realm of prayer; but if He never did this, let us rest satisfied to be among His followers, confessing that it is a greater grace and privilege than we deserve that He should suffer us even to remain in His Presence.

So doing we shall not be restless and eager to speak with Him, knowing that to be silent before Him may be as useful, nay more so, to our souls, although it is less to our liking. When, therefore, you come before the Lord, speak to Him if you can; — if you cannot, remain quietly in His Sight, and do not disturb yourself because you can do no more. This is my advice; — I do not know if it will help you, but I am content to think that you are within reach of many much better counsellors than I am. As for your fear that you might lose the desire to become a Carmelite (Historic Catholic order focused on contemplative life), during the long period of waiting imposed on you by your father, say to God, “Lord, all my desire is before you,” and leave the rest to Him. He will guide your father's heart and turn it to His own Glory and your good. Meanwhile continue to cherish your good desire, and keep it alive beneath the embers of humility and resignation to God's Will.

You ask my prayers, — be sure they shall not be wanting to you; I will not forget you, especially at Holy Mass, and I trust to your charity likewise to remember me in your prayers.²

1. Francis de Sales (1567-1622), a noble-born French Catholic bishop and saint, carved a niche for himself in the heart of the Christian tradition with his moderate approach to the Counter-Reformation and his role as the Bishop of Geneva. Educated at the University of Padua and ordained in 1593, de Sales became known for his writings, including "Introduction to the Devout Life" and "Treatise on the Love of God." His philosophy, best encapsulated by the quote, "Have patience with all things, but, first of all with yourself," highlights his method of gentle persuasion and understanding in religious discourse. Canonized in 1665, his legacy endures as the patron saint of journalists and writers, embodying the spirit of compassionate dialogue and introspective faith.

2. Sales, François de. A Selection from the Spiritual Letters of S. Francis de Sales, tr. by the author of 'Life of s. Francis de Sales'.. United Kingdom: n.p., 1871.